I wanted to share my insights in the last year and a half of solely dating women aged 19-23. During this period, if my memory serves me correct, I only met one woman above age 23 and even she was only 25. As I get closer to 30 (I’m currently 29), I can certainly appreciate the beauty and energy of a younger woman now more than ever. These are my opinions/experiences dating younger women while being age 28-29 myself.
An older guy can still be VERY physically attractive to younger women
This is true, BUT……
You need to make sure you’re not like the average older guy. I find the majority of guys in their late 20’s and up have let themselves go. Most are in VERY poor shape, have lousy style, and seem to have forgotten what grooming is.
I personally believe looks matter A LOT to younger women. Although they may not be subconsciously thinking it, it’s hardwired into their DNA to find the “best possible mating partner” while their “prime” looks still allow them to do so.
I think one of the main reasons I’m able to still be considered physically attractive to younger women is because of my healthier lifestyle.
I don’t smoke, I don’t do drugs, and I can count on one hand how many alcoholic beverages I’ve consumed in the past year. Also, for the most part, I only eat healthy food and exercise 5-6 times a week RELIGIOUSLY! I generally sleep 7-8 hours a night which is crucial for good health and maintaining a youthful look. As of late, I’ve had people who didn’t know me very well think I was only 25. It’s definitely quite flattering as you get a bit older.
Even though I’ll be 30 soon, I still get women aged 19-23 referring to me as “hot.”
I can remember a VERY intelligent conversation I had last summer with a girl I’ll call “Becky.”
Becky is 19, blond hair, blue eyes, BIG chest, like size 0 waist, and a nice round booty from playing hockey for years. She’s a total “Barbie doll.”
Anyhow, one night Becky and I were “chillin” at my place when out of the blue she says,
“You know, you’re like a really hot guy, and I like really have like a thing for like hot guys.”
Although I met Becky on Tinder, I once met a younger girl on POF who put down “hot guys” as one of her interests. Believe it or not, the conversations I had with her were very similar in intellect and depth as the ones I’d have with Becky. No, seriously!
Beware of the cell phone
I find younger women tend to be rather obsessed with their phones. It’s important for guys a bit older to know this beforehand if they plan on “dating down” age wise. I”ll admit that sometimes it can come off as incredibly rude when a woman is constantly playing with her phone in front of you, but it’s just something you’ll most likely have to get used to if you plan on dating younger women. That being said, I’ve occasionally met younger women who rarely pulled out their phone.
Texting is something younger women tend to be quite into. You may find if they like you that they text you quite often. I was called out before for being a “bad texter.” I was told I didn’t text enough. I just told her it wasn’t my thing and that I find it very impersonal. Maybe getting called out for “bad text game” was a wake up call for me, though? Anyone know of a complicated/expensive texting manual that will help me “control my frame?”
Age is only a number
Just because a woman is younger, it doesn’t automatically mean she’s immature. I mean, of course, there’s obviously younger women who are extremely immature. Likewise, however, there’s lots of older women that act like teenagers. I know women my age who are INCREDIBLY immature!
The mature younger woman
Now this isn’t an absolute, but I’ve often found younger women who were more on the mature side tended to be the ones who were more educated (or were at least working on their education).
If you meet a younger woman that’s serious about her education/career, you may find she’s not so crazy about guys her own age. The thought of dating a guy whose weekends consist of him squirting beer out his nose and “skirt chasing” doesn’t appeal that much to some women. Obviously that’s a bit of a generalization and not all younger guys are like that.
If you’ve ever used the dating site POF before you likely know that some women have requirements you need to meet in order to message them. Age happens to be one of them. You’ll notice that some women, although only age 19-23 themselves, will only allow guys older than them message them.
I was recently in Montreal and met up with a girl from Tinder who was 22. She told me that she only swipes for guys aged 27-35 as she’s not interested in younger men.
Mature younger women may see you as a catch
If you happen to meet a younger woman who is more on the mature side, you may find she latches on to you rather quickly if she sees you as a catch.
I can think of a prime example of this last fall. I was seeing a girl who was 22 and in her final year of nursing school. She was quite attractive, had good style, an athletic build, and an AMAZING personality (she was so easy going and would actually FULL NFL games without complaining. She was a “sports fans” dream :P).
She pushed for a serious commitment about 2 months in and wanted me to move to a place she believed she was going to hired as a nurse after she finished nursing school. I didn’t want to move where she was moving to so I was honest and told her that. She was quite upset and that was it between us.
It was something I honestly thought about almost daily for a month. I wondered if I had made the right decision. Women that “check off all the boxes” so to speak are a rarity.
Assuming your looks are up to snuff, I think a HUGE reason some younger women prefer older men is stability.
Guys a bit older tend to be more stable. They tend to have their careers on track and often have some money. In fact, some guys may be quite well off by now. Be cautious of women who seem WAY too interested in your wallet, though. You don’t need to be “Charlie cheapskate,” but being her “sugardaddy” isn’t so great either.
Older guys also tend to have their own own place. You own a home or you have an apartment. Even if your house/ apartment isn’t exactly the fanciest, make sure it’s clean. This also a huge tip for younger guys dating younger women. Keeping your place tidy will impress younger women.
And finally, you likely have a more chill lifestyle than guys her age which is VERY attractive to her as well. You’re more or less past the “party every weekend” phase and are more relaxed in general. You’re comfortable with yourself and can “just be you.” Maturity and independence is a real turn on to a mature younger woman.
So, yeah, sometimes older guys can provide younger women with life experiences and a lifestyle that younger men are just not capable of.
A lot of these women aren’t an option for you
Although you can still meet younger women as an older guy, there’s a harsh reality to this…..
A lot of these women are NOT available!
In fact, I believe this is the age range that women are least likely to be single. If I were to guess, I’d say 2/3’s of these women are already taken.
Women have LOTS of options at this age.
If she’s attending a larger university, there’s not shortage of men for her to date. Even if she’s not attending any educational program, she most likely has friends who are, and has access to the happening social scene.
As I’ve already said, I believe looks are VERY important in order to attract younger women, and here’s another harsh reality…..
There’s LOTS of men her age who are VERY good looking.
Some women at this age will have absolutely ZERO interest whatsoever in dating older men as there’s tons of “hot guys” their age.
How much of an age gap between the two you will also factor into this. If you’re closing in on 40, chances are you’re not going to have much success with women aged 19-23.
Wild Social Lives
Just as women at this age tend to have a lot of options for men, they also tend to have a lot of options for social activities.
If she’s in university, she likely has access to all the top parties and such.
Women at this age generally LOVE to party. And can you blame them? I know I sure did at that age.
When I work day shifts I have to be up rather early in the morning and I ALWAYS shut the ringer off on my phone as I value my sleep and don’t want to be awoken by a random text or notification. Anyhow, I recall waking up numerous times last summer after my alarm went off and seeing missed texts around 2:15-2:30 am (bars close at 2am where I live) that said,
“lol are you still up?”
All I could do was chuckle.
Seeing as women at this age tend to have very active social lives, I find these women are also the most likely to flake.
Think about it from their perspective, though. They can either meet up with a guy they hardly know, or they can head out with friends they’ve known for a long time to a rocking party.
I think it’s a VERY poor idea to try and schedule a first date with a younger woman on a weekend evening. I mean, sometimes it may be the only time you can schedule it, but these women often have a lot options on the weekend for plans.
Potential for drama
Now this drama thingy tends to tie into the wild social life. Although not all women this age drink, a lot of them do.
Sometimes silly “bar tales” will get brought up about some drama that went down the night before and such. (I find it’s best to not really say much when hearing stuff like this)
Sometimes, though, you’ll experience some of this drama “head on” so to speak. I can think of a perfect example of this last summer.
I can still remember this night like it were yesterday. I was sleeping as I had to work that day and was awoken by a loud banging. I was still sleepy and wondered where the noise was coming from. The door to my apartment is downstairs and I quickly realized that’s where it was coming from. I looked at my phone and noticed it was 2:30 am. I didn’t have any new texts on my phone and wondered who in the world was banging on my door at 2:30 in the morning. I go down, open the door and see it was Becky(the blond “Babrie” I spoke about earlier in this article). It was immediately obvious to me that she was drunk. She walked in and said,
“Hey. What’s going on?”
I replied, “I was sleeping. It’s 2:30 in the morning.”
She then says, “So you don’t want me to come upstairs then?”
I replied, “Well, maybe I’m not that tired.”
She then started to “tease” for a bit and kept saying, “No, you’re too tired for me to come up!”
Anyhow, she eventually came upstairs and almost immediately noticed 2 empty ice cream dishes on my counter. I had another girl over that evening and forgot to dispose of the “evidence.”
Becky lost it and started borderline screaming at me,
“You’re such a prick. I thought you were a nice guy. I was really starting to like you.”
She then proceeded to tell me about all these “hot guys” that were interested in her. I felt as though she was DHV’ing (pickup artist term for “demonstrating high value” through storytelling) herself to me.
She continued to be VERY loud and I ultimately told her that she had to leave as it was unacceptable.
Now I’ll admit that perhaps I wasn’t exactly the most moral of characters last summer, but I also wasn’t “officially” in a relationship so I was playing the field pretty hard so to speak.
Younger women tend to have less baggage
Although you may encounter some childish drama from time to time, you’ll most likely have less baggage to deal with when it comes to younger women.
One of the obvious reasons for this is that she hasn’t been out in “real world” long enough. These women are only a few years removed from high school.
When you start going for women 30+, you’ll find there’s a much higher chance she already has at least one kid. Heck, some women my age are already divorced/separated.
Where you are at in your life
This a HUGE factor when it comes to dating younger women.
Although there may be tons of mutual physical attraction, you both may be in completely different stages of your life.
For example, let’s say you’re 30 and in the hopes of finding “the one.” You have a steady career, your own place, a good group of friends, and would like to top it off with a great woman. Even though you may be able to still attract 19 year old women, what are the chances you and her are both looking for the same thing? If she’s in university, she likely still has AT LEAST another 3 years of school left.
You may find if there’s too much of an age gap that it’s very hard to relate to the girl. She may be in full out “party mode” while you are in “settle down” mode. She likely won’t like it too much either if you call her out on partying all the time!
I think this article was essential so guys have realistic expectations in regards to meeting younger women.