Guys, in this article, I want to talk about the coffee date and share some reasons with you why it’s such a great date idea, and also give you some tips so you can CRUSH it on your next coffee date!
Let’s start with some advantages:
Not a huge commitment/big deal
Just as us guys don’t like the pressure that can sometimes come with a date, trust me, neither do women.
Meeting a total stranger for lunch/dinner, for example, can lead to all kinds of awkwardness such as…
“Should I pay?”
“What should I order?”
“Did I dress up too much/too little?”
“Do I have spinach stuck to my teeth?”
The list goes on….
Going for a coffee, however, is such a simple and laid back date that it won’t cause a woman to feel much pressure.
Gives off that “not a big deal” kind of vibe.
Also, on average, most coffee dates don’t run much more than an hour so it’s a not a huge time commitment for either one of you.
Speaking of time commeitment….
Allows either party to excuse themselves rather quickly if things don’t go as planned
Part of the reason I think coffee dates are so great is because they’re such a small commitment that either party can excuses themselves rather quickly if need be.
Although I’m a big fan of online dating and I really think it’s the way of the future for dating, sometimes when you actually meet a woman in person from an online dating site, let’s just say they’re not quite “as advertised.”
Or, perhaps her attitude is really negative or she has some qualities you don’t particularly like.
If any or all of the above are true, you can “bolt” rather quickly.
You don’t need to be rude,
Just say, “I have to be honest, I really don’t see this going anywhere and I’m going to excuse myself. Take care.”
When you go for a meal or another type of date that costs more money you may stick around for a certain period of time and feel somewhat “obligated” to do so even though you know you don’t ever see her ever again.
On the topic of money….
Low on cash?
No big deal.
Coffee dates don’t cost much anyways.
Going for a coffee date shouldn’t generally cost you any more than $10.
I believe you should always offer to pay for her drink.
If you gets there before you and has already bought a drink, this date with only cost you a few bucks.
Also, sometimes when you first start dating, you can get “the shakes” and have not as great of dates.
If this happens and you have to “go back to the drawing board” here and there, at least it’s not costing you very much money for these dates that didn’t work out so well.
Or, perhaps you just want to go on a lot of dates and you’re finally hitting your groove and MANY women are agreeing to go on dates with you
Trust me, going on a lot of dates that are expensive will drain your bank account REALLY quick!
Gets you experienced talking to women
This might be the best advantage of all to going on coffee dates.
You improve your conversational skills with women.
Guys who haven’t spoken to many women before will often feel very nervous interacting with them.
Coffee dates will help you work on your conversation skills and get you more comfortable talking to women.
Some women will be real talkers and thus make it very easy for you.
Some, however, will hardly say a word and you will need to keep the conversation going yourself.
This will also get you used to different personalities of different women.
Now that we’ve cover some advantages let me give you some tips to have better coffee dates:
Suggest to meet her there
Unless a woman asks for you to pick her up, I suggest just meeting her at the coffee place.
This plays into the “not a big deal” idea and she won’t have to jump into a vehicle with a total stranger right off the bat.
You want her to feel as comfortable as possible.
Avoid retail coffee chains
I strongly recommend avoiding big name coffee chains and most especially ones that could deemed “fast food.”
I have always found that the best coffee dates I had were at spots that were “diamonds in the rough,” so to speak, and were local/indepentally owened shops.
This will also make you stand out from other guys who took her to big name coffee chains before.
Go for a walk outside if it’s nice weather
Although you may initially meet at the coffee shop, if it’s a nice day you may want to go for a walk outside.
If there’s some really nice scenery, a historical piece, or something interesting going on in the city you live in, this can help make the conversation much more interesting as opposed to blasting her with non-stop questions and doing the typical “interview-style” date.
Speaking of the conversation…..
Keep the conversation light
This should really just be small talk.
You want to find out about her passions and hobbies.
You should reveal yours as well.
If you like traveling and have done a lot of it, talk about that a bit.
If she reveals she likes running or fitness, get her to expand on it.
In fact, try her to get her to talk about herself more than you talk about yourself.
This will make it easier for you if you’re a bit shyer as you won’t have to do as much talking and you get to find out more about her.
Just keep the conversation light, be positive, smile from time to time and listen to her when she’s talking.
Don’t over think it too much.
Avoid being negative or pushing strong opinions on religion, politics, or any controversial topic.
Relax and have fun
She agreed to meet you for a coffee date so she has at least some sort of interest in you.
Have fun and enjoy the experience of being on date with a woman you’re interested in ;)
Give it try and enjoy this simple and effective date idea
Also, let me know in the comments if you have any tips or additonal ideas for a coffee date.